7 Tips for Your Camper's Departure Day
June 11, 2024
Guest blog by Dr. Tracy Brenner, “The Camp Counselor,” alumna camper and counselor, and camp parent
The bags are packed, the duffles are gone and in a matter of days, your child will be off to camp. As parents, we often refer to this day as “departure day,” representing the sense that it’s the day we say goodbye and our kids leave home. Camps refer to this same day as “opening day,” though, because it’s not about leaving; it’s about arriving. It’s the kickoff to the summer, the start of something new, the welcome to a camper’s summer home. The different language - one word symbolizes loss, the other gain – reflects the very real and mixed feelings that campers and parents feel: sadness and worries associated with_ leaving _mixed with excitement and anticipation of arriving. Today I’ll provide some tips for a smooth departure.
Keem **** ‘em busy:
In the week or so leading up to camp, if your child is done with school, try to keep them busy: go to sporting events, see a show; pick strawberries, visit a waterpark; take a day trip to a nearby city. More downtime can lead to excessive worrying. Distraction is a great tool.
Make a plan for the night before:
Talk with your camper about how they’d like to spend the night before camp. Let them have control over the experience by choosing where and what they’d like to eat and whether they’d like to spend the evening with just immediate family or extended family and friends too. This may mean you have to say “no,” to friends and relatives who are eager for one last hug. That may disappoint them, but it’s important to prioritize the needs of your child and give them autonomy on this special night.
Be open to a pivot:
Yes, I think it’s great to have a thoughtful “last night” plan. However, be flexible if the best laid plans don’t ultimately feel “right.” Last summer, my son chose to go to dinner at our local hibachi restaurant. When we sat at our table, we were on sensory overload: It was hot, loud and crowded. Feeling overwhelmed, my son turned to me and said, “I can’t do this!” Our family made a quick pivot: We grabbed takeout and had a fun night at home. When his initial vision of how he wanted to spend the night just didn’t feel right, we let him call an audible that felt like a better match for what he needed in that moment.
**Consider an alternative departure-day plan for younger siblings: **
Think about whether bringing younger sibling(s) to the bus/airport/drop-off is best for your camper and you. If the younger sibling(s) are likely to have big emotional reactions or will require a lot of your attention, think about asking a relative, friend or sitter to watch your younger one(s). It can also be hard for your camper, who may be sad to leave, to have the visual of the intact family unit, minus them. It’s fine If the whole immediate family needs/ wants to be there, but consider the benefits of having that special time for just the parents and camper.
**Prepare for the actual goodbye; describe the departure scene: **
Kids feel less anxious when they know what to expect. Therefore, give them as many details as possible about the actual setting and experience of departure. For example, if your child is traveling by bus, share something like:
“We are going to go to a shopping center very early in the morning. There will be several buses there–lots of campers and their families. Some returning campers might be running to each other, screaming and hugging, so excited to be reunited and start the camp summer. Others might be more quiet and nervous standing close to their parents. That whole range of experiences and feelings is completely normal.”
If you’re driving your child to camp, make a clear plan for where and when you will say goodbye and tell your child in advance. That way you won’t get stuck in a “can you just stay a little longer?” struggle.
Explore the likelihood of mixed feelings:
Ask your child what they expect they might feel, and what might be challenging about departure day. Validate their feelings. Explain that our bodies feel nervousness and excitement very similarly and it’s likely that they’ll feel mixtures of both. Explain that two things are true: They can feel sad about “departing” and excited about “arriving.” Parents, you probably have mixed feelings too! If you are prone to tears, rather than bottle it all up, tell your child you may get a little misty eyed because goodbyes are hard. If you cry, reassure your child that you are okay, you’re just having a natural reaction to a goodbye.
**Plan for the QUICK goodbye: **
Whether your child is traveling by bus, plane, or car, make that goodbye quick. ** ** Tell your child that as soon as they call campers to depart, you are going to give a quick hug, and they are going to put one foot in front of the other and go. Lingering makes it harder! If you or your child is worried about who they will sit with, or if you feel your child might need a little additional support letting go, signal a camp staff member for assistance. They are there to help!
Parents, you’re almost at the big day. Armed with these tools, you’re ready to set your child up to manage the feelings of both departure and arrival.
Maine Camp Experience Resources & Tools
Looking for the perfect Maine camp for your child? Try out our helpful_ tool where you can select a camp by choosing__: type of camp (girls, boys or coed) and session length (1-8 weeks). It helps to narrow down a few camps to a manageable list that includes rates. Then you can research these camps in more depth. _
Next, be sure to contact our Maine Camp Guide, Laurie to discuss these camps as well as for free, year-round advice and assistance on choosing a great Maine summer camp for your child.