Camp Letters and Calls

Guest blog for MCE by Dr. Tracy Brenner, “The Camp Counselor,” Maine Camp alumna and camp parent

You did it! Your kids are off to camp, busy making friends, trying new things, and building independence. Now comes the hard part for parents: the waiting. We wait for letters and look forward to that precious phone call. These moments can be joyful, emotional, and sometimes triggering.

Whether the letter is glowing, the call feels awkward, or your camper says they’re homesick, here are some tips to help you prepare emotionally and respond supportively—without disrupting the powerful growth your child is doing at camp.

Prepare Yourself

Before you check the mail or hop on a call, set the emotional stage: Remind yourself: “This might be positive, neutral, or hard—and it’s just one moment in time and unlikely emblematic of their entire experience” Acknowledge your own feelings: Missing your child, worrying about their happiness, and feeling sad if they are struggling is normal. Remind yourself, they can handle their hard moments and so can you. Remember: Struggle isn’t failure—it’s growth. Campers develop resilience because they face challenges and overcome them. While it may feel difficult in the moment, getting through tough times is what builds resilience and makes us feel proud.

Now for the nitty gritty:

Letters from Camp: What They Do (and Don’t) Mean

The joyful (or brief) letter: Savor it! Your camper is settling in and adjusting well.

The homesick letter: Deep breath. Here’s what to keep in mind:

Letters are often written during downtime, when emotions run high and kids are naturally thinking about home. Mail is delayed—especially USPS letters. That sad letter may already be outdated by the time you’re reading it. Look at the whole letter. Don’t zero in on the hardest sentence. If they mention trying something new or liking an activity, those are real too and equally important. What (and How) to Write Back Respond to tough letters with a mix of empathy, trust, and encouragement. You might say:

Dear [Camper’s Name], I got your letter and I could tell you were really missing us when you wrote it (notice that time stamp! It may be old news!). I imagine that’s the hardest part about camp. I believe you—and I believe in you. You can do hard things. Even when it feels tough, try to throw yourself into something you enjoy— like gymnastics or games with friends. Remember all the people there who care about you, and ask for a hug if you need one. I’m sending one in this letter too. Love you always, Mom/Dad

Shortly after those first letters come, you’ll be gearing up for phone calls. Phone calls (and especially face time) can trigger emotion. Below are some tips to prepare yourself:

Phone Calls & FaceTime: What to Expect

Anything goes—and it’s usually not what you imagined. Some things to keep in mind: Awkward is normal. Kids don’t talk on the phone much these days so having a fluid conversation may be a tall order.

Distraction happens. Campers might be in busy offices or just pulled out of an activity and may not be so focused. It’s not a sign that something is wrong. There’s just a lot going on. Emotions may run high. Hearing your voice may bring out tears (yours or theirs). That’s okay—and usually short-lived. Counselors are there to scoop your camper up and provide support right after the call ends.

Don’t take it personally if they seem eager to get back to the action at camp. That’s a good sign—they’re immersed!

Make the Most of Your Call

Have some low-key questions ready: If your child isn’t super chatty, come armed with some easy questions to get them talking about their experience but don’t pull for emotional intensity.

• “Tell me about the camp food: what are the best and worst meals so far?”
• “Tell me something silly that happened.”
• “Tell me about the kids in your bunk- where they’re from and what they’re like”

Prep for goodbye: Early in the call, remind your child that there’s a time limit on the call and when that time is up, you’ll hang up quickly. This helps avoid drawn-out, emotional farewells which can be painful for both child and parent.

Remember: Your child will experience joy, struggle, connection, and growth this summer. So will you. No one is happy all the time, and no camp experience is perfect—so if the reports are not glowing- that’s okay. Your job isn’t to remove all discomfort; it’s to stay steady and supportive while your child builds confidence and resilience.

You’ve given your child the gift of camp. Now give yourself the gift of perspective. Breathe. Trust. And keep writing those letters.